Place : in the airplane
Date : 26th July 2012
Time : 4.30 pm
I boarded the plane knowing that I'd be on it for the next 11 hours more or less and once I arrive Singapore I'd have to take a 1 hour connecting flight to Kuala Lumpur then 1 hour 45 minutes to Kuching. I cringed at the thought of such a long journey. I looked at the seating plan and realised that 33A was smacked right beside the window! Hehe loving that :)
I found my seat, placed my hand luggage in the overhead compartment above me and then breathed a sigh of relief as I settled down. I had only 7 hours of sleep in the last 48 hours and I was extremely tired. Minutes later a blonde-haired lady who was perhaps in her 50s claimed the aisle seat next to me by putting her handbag there just before she stored her hand luggage in the overhead compartment as I did not long before. She caught a glance of my tired face and we smiled at each other.
For the first 5 hours none of us said anything to each other until I needed to go to the bathroom. I politely asked the lady next to me if she could make way for me. She smiled, got up for me and sat down again. We started a conversation after I returned to the seat. I found out that she's actually a British citizen who had been living in Cape Town for the past 23 years. She has 2 sons - the eldest a Math teacher and the youngest a future lawyer.
"So are you off to have a holiday in Singapore?" I inquired predictably.
"No, no. I'm going to Australia. Just transiting in Singapore," she clarified.
"Oh, a holiday in Australia then?" I chirped.
"Actually I'm moving to Australia for good. I'm going to meet my partner. He lives in Sydney," she further elaborated.
"Oh okay," I replied for what I thought would be the last time because I didn't want to ask anything else in fear of being intrusive.
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"I recently left my husband of over 20 years to be with him. Now we're finally going to live together," she continued with pure excitement in her voice.
Quite surprised by her revelation I didn't really know what to say except, "Oh wow, now that's something you don't hear everyday!"
She laughed at my response and began to tell me the whole story. She said she was very young when she met her ex husband. She had met him while travelling around Cape Town to meet up with a good friend of hers. They met and I suppose they fell in love and got married. They moved back and forth between Cape Town and England until she had her first child.
It was then she settled in Cape Town for the next 20 years or so of her life. They ran a printing business together and life was fairly good to them. Then one day an old friend whom she had once met while travelling around England had contacted her sister. She remembered him and they decided to keep in touch via e-mail before talking to each other on the phone frequently. After a few months of rekindling their friendship she had realised there was something amiss in her relationship with her husband. When I asked her how she came about the decision to leave her husband she merely said, "He wasn't the right one."
Obviously I wasn't going to settle for that answer so I asked, "How do you tell when someone's the right one?"
She went silent for a good 30 seconds and her facade became more serious all of a sudden. "I suppose you could say it's very individual. But I say it's when you have absolutely no doubt in your heart about the person," she replied after reflecting.
"So let me get this straight. You decided to leave your husband for a man you had not seen for almost 30 years? You just communicated with him via email and telephone?" I asked in absolute disbelief.
"Yup! I told him that I wasn't the same size 12 girl he had met 30 years ago. I've changed and a lot has happened since then. But we still understand each other same way we did before. He understands me in ways my husband never did. I left my husband and he left his wife," the lady confessed. Not long after their life-changing decisions they reunited when he visited her for 10 days in Cape Town.
As I was absorbing everything she was telling me I sort of knew what she meant. "It's like you never have to explain the way you feel to that other person, right? Like they just get you without you having to say why or how you felt and did this or that," I trailed after her.
Her face lit up as she said, "Yes! Exactly!"
"I recently left my husband of over 20 years to be with him. Now we're finally going to live together," she continued with pure excitement in her voice.
Quite surprised by her revelation I didn't really know what to say except, "Oh wow, now that's something you don't hear everyday!"
She laughed at my response and began to tell me the whole story. She said she was very young when she met her ex husband. She had met him while travelling around Cape Town to meet up with a good friend of hers. They met and I suppose they fell in love and got married. They moved back and forth between Cape Town and England until she had her first child.
It was then she settled in Cape Town for the next 20 years or so of her life. They ran a printing business together and life was fairly good to them. Then one day an old friend whom she had once met while travelling around England had contacted her sister. She remembered him and they decided to keep in touch via e-mail before talking to each other on the phone frequently. After a few months of rekindling their friendship she had realised there was something amiss in her relationship with her husband. When I asked her how she came about the decision to leave her husband she merely said, "He wasn't the right one."
Obviously I wasn't going to settle for that answer so I asked, "How do you tell when someone's the right one?"
She went silent for a good 30 seconds and her facade became more serious all of a sudden. "I suppose you could say it's very individual. But I say it's when you have absolutely no doubt in your heart about the person," she replied after reflecting.
"So let me get this straight. You decided to leave your husband for a man you had not seen for almost 30 years? You just communicated with him via email and telephone?" I asked in absolute disbelief.
"Yup! I told him that I wasn't the same size 12 girl he had met 30 years ago. I've changed and a lot has happened since then. But we still understand each other same way we did before. He understands me in ways my husband never did. I left my husband and he left his wife," the lady confessed. Not long after their life-changing decisions they reunited when he visited her for 10 days in Cape Town.
As I was absorbing everything she was telling me I sort of knew what she meant. "It's like you never have to explain the way you feel to that other person, right? Like they just get you without you having to say why or how you felt and did this or that," I trailed after her.
Her face lit up as she said, "Yes! Exactly!"
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For the next 6 hours we spoke about a lot of things which ranged from our mutual interests in cooking, baking, travelling, life in Cape Town to my studies in Alexandria. I showed her pictures of my adorable little cousins, and she marvelled me with stories of her experiences in Turkey, Egypt and parts of Europe she had travelled to. Despite our differences - age, religion, race, nationality, values - we managed to find our common ground. We were both women. Women who want to be loved for who we are. Women with desires, aspirations and flaws. Maybe next time when you board a plane try striking a conversation with the person next to you. You never know what you could learn about others and more interestingly, about yourself.
I don't know what went wrong in her marriage but who am I to judge her? Who am I to say what she did was wrong or right as a matter of fact? I don't believe that we live in black and white world. I don't think God ever intended it to be seen in only those 2 shades. I believe in embracing the colours of life and learning to respect the fact that people come in all shapes, sizes, skin tones, cultures and backgrounds. I also believe this is what makes God and His attributes all the more real to me.
Hours had passed and the plane landed smoothly in Singapore. Before we parted ways I wished her all the best for her new life and she did the same for me. "And don't forget, when you choose your man make sure he's worth it," she said authoritatively but in a motherly way. As I smiled at her advise the traffic in front of me moved and I walked out of the plane feeling so happy that I'm only few hours away from home and that my 12 hour journey back to Malaysia is almost over.
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